Building a strong relationship as a same-sex couple doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Here are some tips to help!
Building a strong relationship isn’t always the easiest task. It can be surprising just how much stress we have to juggle in our daily lives along with trying to keep our partners happy, and sometimes it just seems like too much to handle. This difficulty can be compounded with same-sex couples, especially given the added stress with which they might be contending. Luckily, it turns out that building strong and lasting same-sex relationships doesn’t have to be a chore – and, in fact, that the process doesn’t differ too much from the one straight couples face. Let’s take a look at some tips to keep in mind as you work on creating the relationship of your dreams.
Be Mindful of External Stressors
While most relationships face the same struggles whether the people in them are straight or members of the LGBTQ+ community, it’s worth noting that same-sex couples face added external stressors when compared to straight relationships. Some people might find themselves attempting to accept family disapproval, for example, as they move forward with their partner. Social isolation can pose a big threat to these relationships, too, and social rejection could from longtime friends, family members, or even coworkers. Add to that the fact that it can be difficult to do things that straight couples take for granted, like hold hands in public, without facing scorn and it’s really no surprise that external stressors often take a toll on same-sex relationships.
Everyone has different boundaries and different situations with which they’re uncomfortable. Many same-sex couples struggle with living an “out and proud” lifestyle. Or, to be more specific, couples can struggle to have the same level of comfort with certain actions. It isn’t unusual for one partner to have already “come out” to their loved ones while their partner is still working up to that momentous step. Don’t try to force this on your loved one! Give them the patience and support they need to make the best decision for their needs. Keep in mind that while you might have already gone through this experience and are impatient to live happily with your partner without the need for secrecy or censorship around family or friends, your partner might be struggling quite a bit with the idea of how their life might change in the near future.
And, on the flipside, if your partner has already come out or is more comfortable with things like public displays of affection, don’t be afraid to talk to them about it. Ask for their opinion and their reasoning – you might be surprised at how much what they’re saying makes sense. Don’t hesitate to ask for support or understanding, either. You want to build a strong relationship based on mutual trust, right? So make sure that you can both trust each other in the good times as well as the more complicated times.
Find the Perfect Community
Because same-sex couples can sometimes struggle to find social acceptance, it’s important to find an LGBTQ+ community within which you can make a home for yourself. There are various resources online to help you find local spaces and groups with views and values that align with your own. Don’t hesitate to turn to the people with whom you already have a close relationship and ask them for some additional support if you need it, either. Friendship is a give-and-take process where all parties involved should be ready to offer support as well as ask for some in turn.
Keep the Spark Alive
Most relationships go through different phases, and not all of them involve deep passion and romantic tension. Sometimes you might find the romance slipping away a bit, especially when you’re concerned or focused on other things. Thanks to the wonders of technology, however, it can be quick and easy to get your partner’s blood pumping no matter how far apart you might be. Turn on your gay partner through sexting and see just how much you can push things before they make it home! Just make sure that you talk to them beforehand so that they’re not caught off guard or uncomfortable with your sudden barrage of R-rated messages. For some added spice, consider working some of their fantasies into the conversation!
Check Out for a Bit
While technology can be great, it can also be a bit overwhelming. It’s easier today than ever before to be plugged into the news as well as your social circle 24/7. And while it’s nice to be able to reach your loved ones quickly and easily or stay updated about an important event, it’s even nicer to have some time completely unplugged from other people’s worries. Take some time for you and your spouse to simply enjoy being together. Don’t worry about the news, don’t worry about what’s going on with your friends or family – tune into each other be grateful for the relationship and love that you’ve found. This might sound easier said than done, but it’s a surprisingly simple process that gets easier (and more rewarding) the more you practice it. Try checking out for dinner and go on from there.
Are you in a same-sex relationship and a bit unsure about how to build a deep and lasting bond with your partner? That’s okay! Take a look above at our tips and see how they might apply to your relationship. Don’t worry if not everything matches – not all couples will deal with the exact same struggles. It’s likely that at least some of what we outline will seem familiar, however, and that’s where you can start to improve things. The first, and most important, a step of the process is to speak with your significant other and discuss your concerns and goals. Communication is invaluable, and their input can help ensure that by the time you’ve worked your way through our advice, your relationship is as strong and happy as possible.
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