Knowing What Real Men Look for in Women

As a lady you may have often wondered what it is that men are really after in women. It is fascinating to see a guy date different girls and break up with them only to finally settle for one whom in your own judgment is not as “fit” as the others. Just like men always want to know what exactly about them women are concerned about, women too often seek to know what about them men are actually interested in. Enough of all the game playing and speculations. When it comes to the deepest desire in the hearts of most ladies, it is a desire not just to be loved and cherished but to at last be married. Truth is, there are certain qualities and desirable traits in a woman a man will look for and when it comes to settling down with someone, they are more likely to choose a woman with the following qualities.

Physically attractive

Physical attractiveness, which is the quality of looking good is one of the qualities men look for in women. Though it is not necessarily one of the attributes of a good woman, it can be the first thing that attracts a serious man to you. Mind you, this is not the same as being sexy. Away with the issue of exposing every body part that should be covered in the name of looking attractive. Remember we are talking about what real men look for a women. And by real men, I mean mature guys who are done playing games and know exactly what they are after. The definition of being physically attractive is different to people depending on what they find appealing. But generally there is a similarity between what real men find attractive. Before leaving the house every other day, take out some time to do your makeup. Learn what makeup styles and colors fit you and avoid overdoing it. Be simply attractive. Theres no need for expensive jewelry and clothings you may not even be able to afford. Just learn what works for you and stick to it. However do not be narrow minded when it comes to styles. Try new things. A new hair style, dressing style and way of doing your makeup. If you are not flexible enough, you will hardly be able to realize more attractive ways of dressing, doing your hair or wearing makeup.

Now to colors. Women are generally drawn to bright looking colors. It fits them better and more so, it is one of the most important aspects of physical attraction when it comes to dressing. Learn to blend colors and consider those colors that particularly suit your complexion. When you go out for parties or gatherings where you perceive there could be potential suitors or real men, dress for the occasion and make it responsible. Your dressing style tells a lot about you, especially if a guy is going to meet you for the first time. When a guy sees you for the very first time and approaches you, he may have a hundred different perspectives about women to choose from. Just make sure your dressing does not make him choose the wrong one. If your dressing is overly sexy, you may attract a player instead of a real man. Real men are attracted to maturity and decency. They may admire the sexy nature of your body language and looks but men who are really worth the stress will desire a lady who portrays the image of responsibility and dignity. The way you look will determine the kind of man you attract. The ability to be sexy without necessarily looking seductive is one of the desirable traits in a woman every real man will like to associate with.

Friendly and sociable

Taking men through “the chase” is one things guys have not really been able to understand about women. As much as women seem to like this aspect of relationships, you must understand that it is not one of the desirable traits in a woman. You come to realize that the same women who seems to really need a real man won’t just accept him when he shows up. Maybe it proves their worth, maybe some anticipate that it will make them more valuable in the eyes of the chaser. Well, the phenomenon of playing hard to get is not exactly what I am driving at. The issue is, some women choose to go about it the wrong way. The desire to be hard to get should not drive you to unruly or disrespectful behavior. Don’t take a guy through demoralizing episodes just to tease him or prove a point. Be friendly with guys who approach you.

On a general note, being friendly is a quality which every lady who want to attract and keep a real man must possess. The attributes of a good woman will hardly be noticeable if she is not friendly. Real men are looking for ladies who can hang out and have fun with them. Ladies with whom they can spend time and not wish they were with their boy friends instead. If you can be a guy’s best buddy, there is a higher chance of getting him to fall in love with you. Guys too want someone they can be playful with. Someone with whom they share and feel free to express some child like moments. It is one of the desirable traits in a woman men usually long for. Ladies who are always too serious and uptight will hardly find a real man to relate with. You must remember that real men are hard working men and usually they have a lot of stuff going on in their lives. This makes it even more necessary to have someone with whom they can share moments that let off some steam. Be flexible sociable and friendly. You can attract better men with these qualities than you would with an overly serious personality.

The right character

Everyone has a unique character and people could be attracted to these character traits for different reasons. Having the right character as a woman is important in order to attract a real man. It is not profitable to pretend or act up here. You must know what character traits you have will qualify as good and which of them will qualify as bad. Even if you are physically beautiful and attractive, you will send off too many great many with a bad character, indeed character is like pregnancy, if you have some repulsive aspects of your character, deal with them before or as you look for a real man. You definitely don’t want someone to fall in love with you only to dump you later on because of your character. Believe me, it will hurt terribly. It is better to make sure you posses the attributes of a good woman so that when the opportunity shows up, you can attract the right person.

Be humble. Like I sometimes say, men are like kings, they will fight the one who competes with them but protect or cherish the one who submits to them. As one of the qualities men look for in women, humility is usually non negotiable. No real man is willing to put up with a lady who is not humble and submissive. This does not mean allowing yourself to be trampled upon you by men. And by the way any man who will take advantage of your being submissive is not a real man. Real men love, cherish and protect ladies who are humble and submissive to them. In the simplest way, I will say being humble and submissive to a man means allowing him to be the man in the relationship. Men, real men don’t like women who are bossy or oppose them over everything on which a decision has to be made.

Respect. We usually say respect is reciprocal and rightly so. But as a lady, you must understand that what men crave for most in women is respect. Being respectful is very closely linked to humility and it is one of the qualities men look for in women. Women on the other hand crave for affections and love. For that reason, most women think men want the same thing. There is hardly a better gift a woman can give to a man than to respect him. There is an attitude you portray when you respect someone and that attitude must be in place in order to attract the right man. Believe me, respecting a man will be even more beneficial to you than it will be to a man in a relationship. For one thing, respect is something many ladies find difficult to give, not knowing that real men honor and respect ladies who respect them. Again, this is part of giving a man his place in a relationship. Let him be the man by giving him the respect he deserves.

Hard working

Being hard working as a woman is not about being able to take care of yourself. That is not what real men want. A real man understands that he has to be the provider for his woman, even if he is not going to completely provide everything she wants. The issue is, real men, like you should already know are looking for someone they can build a life with. Someone who can actually help them achieve their goals and has a goal he can help her achieve. Without these things, life, especially life together will seem very boring. That’s why hard work as one of the attributes of a good woman is important to possess. Many women live in the illusion that me that they can get or keep a man by giving him sex. This is not only a naive way of thinking, it is a display of shallowness in life. You cannot build a relationship on passions and romance. You must be a woman who is about something. One who has dreams she is pursuing. One whose commitments can make her husband proud and confident. You should know that just like women like to boast about the status of their husbands, husbands too love it when their wives are up to something meaningful. Something that impacts society and positively affects the lives of people.


This is one of the best qualities in a woman real men usually look out for. One will normally think of dressing when decency is mentioned. But the issue of being decent goes beyond the dresses you wear to the way you behave when around other people or alone. It is one of those qualities men look for in women. For example there are certain habits that any reasonable or real man will find indecent and repulsive. One of such things that sets real men of is smoking. It doesn’t matter why you do it or how long you have been into it. If you really want a great man, you cannot afford to indulge in such a habit. Even some men who smoke will not like to have a lady who smokes for a girlfriend talk less of as a wife. Don’t be the type of lady who goes to the club every other night, drinks excessively and comes back late and drunk. One who acts this way may be ready for a relationship but not a relationship with a real man. When real men search, they are just looking for a girl friend or sex partner. They are after a wife and one who can be a mother. There is no way a lady who is indecent can make a good wife or mother unless she is willing to change.


One of the best qualities in a woman is her ability to be committed to something, especially to a relationship. Commitment is one proof that you can build a life with someone. How does one show commitment before getting into a relationship? Well, it is not about “showing” but being. If a lady is committed, it will show in the way she does everything. From her way of discussion to her ability to keep schedules or appointments. The truth is, if you have something in you, there is no need bothering about how to show it. It is definitely going to manifest itself in the way you talk, act and go about your activities. You may not even be conscious of it but the guy who is interested in you will definitely notice it.


Guys can sometimes be difficult to deal with and they know it. It is one of the reasons why real guys look for women who can exercise some level of patience. Men always like to feel that they are in control of things, but sometimes, things don’t work out as planned. Women on the other hand like to assured about every detail of life. They usually want to have an assurance about everything but its hardly possible. This is just one reason why real men search for patient women. let’s take an example. If a man who is engaged to a lady decides to shift their wedding date further for some reason or the other, it will take patience for her to stand the change. But more importantly, there a great deal of patience require to be a real wife and a great mother. Any lady who cannot exercise a certain level of patience will find it hard to successfully pull through a relationship to a marriage and beyond. It is one of the best qualities in a woman who is interested in getting married to a real guy.


Confidence is one of the pillars of a powerful personality and among the best qualities in a woman. Ladies who are self confident and bold are like magnets to real men. A real man is a confident man and you are only going to attract someone who is like you. The ability to believe in yourself so much so that you can go after your dreams and aspirations with boldness and courage is a matter of confidence. It takes some degree of confidence to even support a great man. To stand by his side when the world seems to be against him. To be safe place and one he can confide in when all hell is breaking loose. You will have to be confident in yourself but more than that you must be confident in the man you fall in love with. This quality will set you apart in the midst of other ladies. It will make you stand out so you can attract just the right man.


Real men are ambitions. They have big dreams and plans for their future and the family is always part of that future. Ambition is one of the forces that drive real men from where they are to where they are supposed to be in the future and most men will consider ambition as one of the best qualities in a woman. Women who are narrow minded or limited in their thoughts and aspirations will always seem like a burden these men have to carry along. As a woman who desires a real man, there must be a strong desire to accomplish something in place. It assures the man that should he decide to take you as his partner, there is not going to be a time when his ambitions seem too heavy for you to support him with.

The motherly quality

Again, remember that real men are looking for women they can get married to, build a family together and spend the rest of their lives with. So they look beyond your beauty to a time when there are going to be a mother. The man should be able to locate you in his future. If that is not possible, then it will be difficult for you two to build a life together. But the reason why real men love women with a motherly quality is not just so their children can be well taken care of in future. Men can sometimes get to a place where the situations and circumstances of life push them beyond convenient boundaries. At such times they need a mother, not a wife. They want someone who can give the consolations, advice and assurance that comes from a motherly heart. To a real man, it is one of the attributes of a real woman.

Similar values

T his is not the kind of thing that can be considered generally because each individual has different values. However, the values of real men are basically similar in nature. They consist of things like hard work, honesty, loyalty and dedication. It is therefore important that a lady understands and learns to uphold these values. Remember you can only attract people who have the same values like you do. Our values determine the places we go to and the activities we get ourselves involved with. That alone gives you one reason why you are very likely to attract someone who is just like yourself.


Compatibility is a very big word when it comes to relationships. It includes having similar aspirations, values, ambitions and many more. At the core of it all is having similar beliefs and life principles. The things you are willing to believe in and hold on to are an important part of compatibility. It is one of the desirable traits in a woman every real man carefully considers before getting into a relationship with a lady. No matter how many attributes of a good woman she possesses, they are more or less useless without the attributes of a good woman.

Summarily the qualities that men look for in women may seem too many for one lady to consider, but I guess it comes down to this. When you really make up your mind to get into a serious relationship, determine what kind of man you want to attract and develop in yourself the qualities you want to see. You have a great chance of attracting the kind of person you are.

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