No two people are the same; not even identical twins. Individuals have their unique qualities and traits commonly referred to as personality. The term personality originated from the Latin word “persona” which referred to a theatrical mask that performers used to disguise their identities or to project different roles. Perceiving personality solely in the context of physical appearance is quite inadequate. Personality encompasses a person’s characteristic patterns of thoughts, feelings, dispositions, traits, qualities, speech and behaviors innate in the person and other things that make the person unique.
Personality traits are hardly fixed but rather change continuously as a result of interaction with the environment. Thus, it is influenced both by biological and environmental factors. Our personalities start developing during childhood, and is strengthened and molded as we grow into adulthood. Everywhere we find ourselves; our overall personality greatly determine the level of influence we have, especially on people. Therefore, improving our personalities is of great importance. Many people often do not think of the possibility for their personalities changing later in life or that it can be developed in certain ways. Here’s good news – no matter how old you are, there’s always room for improvement. You can still do something about your personality today. Improving your personality is profitable for advancements in all spheres of life.
Who needs personality development? Since everyone has a personality, everyone needs personality development. Personality is a multifaceted concept with several components – personality traits. People may have many personality traits which include both positive and negative traits hence, there is need for improvement. Given that personality is a product of both biology and the environment, means people may need to manifest different personality traits at different times or situations. For instance, with the emergence of digitalization, people need to be flexible and open to change so as to adapt to the digital system.
The type of personality you want to develop or improve on will determine the specific ways of improving personality. For instance, if you desire to become a more caring person, you must learn to empathize with others.
What is the cost of personality development? There is a common saying that “nothing good comes easy”. Personality development just like any other aspect of development has a cost. Personality development is like a business and we must be ready to invest our time, energy and resources into it. It is a gradual process. Sometimes we may need to give up practices that we used to enjoy, keep away from friends and company we had, read and listen to current events which to us isn’t fun but are necessary ways to improve personality.
However, we would realize that the benefits of improving our personalities outweigh the cost. There is no doubt that the more you invest in personality development, the greater your level of influence and worth. A good personality can guarantee success in your social life, academic life and your career.
Importance of improving personality
Improving one’s personality grooms an individual and brings out the peculiarity of his or her personality. that’s one reason why taking the personality tips herein to heart is important. When people have better personalities, there will be less stress and conflicts since personality development helps people cultivate positive attitudes in life. When people improve their personalities, they are capable of building stronger personal relationships. For instance, being empathetic, sincere, and confident are qualities necessary for smooth interaction with others. Engaging in personality development is a continuous process which ensures continuous improvement and growth of the individual in all spheres of life.
In order to develop your personality, self-understanding is very essential. There is need to evaluate yourself and the traits you possess. However, our personality traits constitute both positive and negative qualities. To develop your personality, you need to focus on your positive personality traits and making them dominant while avoiding the negative aspects of your personality. A good personality includes but is not limited to a person who dresses well and is fluent in speech. You can also think about things that make you happy or the activities you enjoy as part of your personality.
Personality development is not a mystery; neither is it automatic. Personality development entails voluntary and conscious effort employed by a person so as to improve. There are several personality development tips that can help you develop your personality:
Reflect on who you are: We do different things on different days and at different times in different situations. How often do you think about your actions and reactions to situations? The mind is a window that leads us to who we are through the process of reflection. Have a quiet time, breathe deeply, and meditate about your person. Search yourself by wandering back into the past, while examining the current state of your life. As you retreat, investigate your reasons for doing the things you did and not doing the things you did not do; discovering your inner personal reasons will reveal a clearer picture of the person you are. With a deeper sense of self-awareness, it’s time to start reflecting on who you want to become and how best to go about your self-improvement.
Build on your positive traits: Of course, you must know your positive traits to be able to build your personality. After reflecting on yourself, your personality traits become clearer to you. Make an inventory of those traits, both positive and negative traits. Invest more energy towards the attractive and pleasant aspects of your personality. No matter how many or how bad the negative traits are do not give up or quit trying to improve your personality.
Love yourself: How can people feel good about you when you don’t feel good about yourself? You need to love yourself. Loving yourself is all about seeing yourself in a positive light, accepting and appreciating the person you are. Loving yourself is the ability to look beyond your mistakes, faults and weaknesses and still see the beauty that lies within you as well as the ability to rise up above your limitations. When you don’t love yourself, it is easy to quit on yourself, to condemn yourself and this will only lead to a state of frustration, anger and jealousy towards those you feel are better than you. You must learn to love and accept everything about you; your physical appearance, your background and so on and so forth. When you do this, you will lead a happier life full of zeal and motivation to improve yourself and be the best you can.
Accept your mistakes/ take responsibility: Cowardice never connotes is definitely not one of the ways to improve personality. A good personality is manifest in one’s ability to own up to their mistakes and take full responsibility for their actions. Shying away from your responsibilities only reflects a weak and fearful personality. This attribute is called accountability. Interestingly, people always love to take credit for desirable outcomes but avoid standing up for mistakes or unsuccessful outcomes. You should be able to take responsibility for every action or event that concerns you, both good and bad. This demonstrates courage and trustworthiness.
Broaden your knowledge scope:When last did u read a novel, a newspaper, or a magazine? When last did you listen to current events and politics? Have you attended any seminars, conferences, workshops or trainings lately? When was the last time you did research on the Internet apart from idle chats and gossips? Remember that, our lives and personalities are a product of the quality of information we are exposed to. In other words, your mental diet is a huge determinant of your character and personality. You must cultivate the attitude of reading widely and with relevance. Be curious and inquisitive about what happens around you. Instead of watching drama and chatting all day long, engage in meaningful and educative talks with more knowledgeable people. It is also advisable to have a mentor, someone with relevant expertise and intellectual resources to guide you as you navigate life’s pathway.
Keep resourceful company: One key category of environmental factors that influence personality is friends/peers. Sometimes we think and act in certain ways because our friends encourage us to, or act in the same way. For instance, you may dress in a particular way because that’s how your friends dress. Do not associate with people just for the sake of companionship. Rather go after people who can give your life a positive fleur, encourage and support you, and above all add meaning to your life. Identify those with positive traits you admire - your role models and network with them so that they can guide you in those traits you want to emulate.
Be Empathetic: To better understand people around you, you must be able to put yourself in their shoes. Being empathetic is a quality that pertains to a good personality. Unless you put yourself in others’ place and get an understanding of how they feel, you will be insensitive to what happens to others. You must understand that it is not all about you or always about you; others have feelings, opinions and also deserve to be considered. It is selfish to ignore how others feel.
Sell yourself to the world: The world is our stage as individuals; go up there and show the world what you’ve got. Make it known why the world needs you. The world doesn’t go about looking for people who have something to offer, rather those who have something to contribute draw attention through their impact and ability to influence their world. Don’t tell me you have nothing to offer! Everyone has something to give, that thing called your purpose, your passion. The world needs it; the world needs you. As you develop your passion you inevitably improve on your personality.
Be Optimistic:One of the ways to develop your personality is by viewing things from a positive angle. Being optimistic means seeing with an eye of possibilities in the face of difficulties and discovering opportunities amidst challenges. Having a positive mindset and outlook towards life is an attribute that is pleasant and attractive to other people. Not only is it pleasant to others, it also gives the optimistic individual power and resilience, unlike pessimism which presents a dark picture of things with no room for possibilities, or growth but only stagnation and helplessness.
Motivate yourself: Many people always expect to be motivated by others when they can motivate themselves as well. No doubt it feels good to be rewarded and appreciated by others but we must also motivate ourselves from time to time when we engage in desirable behaviors. For instance after studying hard and performing well in your examination, you could reward yourself with a leisure trip. This kind of self encouragement helps you become a better person.
Be a man/woman of integrity: It is one thing to say something and another thing to do it. Many a times, people make a lot of promises, voice out a lot of things but fail to fulfill them. Having integrity simply means being true to your words. Avoid being the kind of person who never says things straight or takes a stand but is fond of twisting and changing words. People with good personalities are often reliable and trust worthy.
Set personal goals: A person without goals can be likened to a car without a destination. How lost and frustrating! Goals are what make our lives meaningful, because they are what we strive to achieve. Among various personality development tips, setting personal goals is very salient. When people have goals, they are time conscious and idleness is avoided. Our set goals are a huge determinant of what we do, and how we do it, because all our actions will be channeled towards achieving our goals.
Develop your interests: We all have our interest, the things that capture our attention. Developing interest is a good way to improve personality. You can develop your interests by reading and interacting with people who share similar interests. Don’t limit your interest to mere hobbies, develop your interests to become your passion and from your passion you could establish an occupation. Research about your interests, get to understand what it entails, find out about people who share similar interests and how they have developed and managed these interests. This will be a platform for you to understand the angle from which you can tackle your interest such that it is relevant and productive.
Be flexible and have a growth mind: In a rapidly changing world as ours, it pays to have a flexible mind. The rigid mind begets stagnation. Everyday experiences the birth of new ideas, new methods and approaches of doing things and to thrive in such circumstances we must be flexible. A flexible person is one who can adapt to any situation. A good personality can be developed by being open and welcoming to noble ideas, irrespective of pre-existing thoughts. Things mustn’t always be the way you want them to be, it is important to know, accept and appreciate what others contribute. No one knows everything; we learn from one another, so the more flexible you are, the more knowledge and experience you can get and the better your personality will be.
Develop good communication skills: How we speak, is a reflection of who we are. How we speak includes our tone of voice, and our speed in talking. Very important to our communication also, is our choice of words. When talking to others we should use decent and respectful words. We must know when to speak and how to speak when necessary. Our words are like fruits whose taste explains the kind of tree we are; good tree or bad tree. One way to improve our personality is by ensuring that we do not use abusive or vulgar words when talking to others. A very common misconception is that shouting proves one’s point. Shouting and intimidating others when talking doesn’t mean your point is right or that it will be accepted. Talking to people in a polite and respectful way while laying emphasis by stressing on certain words and fluctuating voice tone yields better communication outcomes.
Furthermore, interrupting a conversation and getting involved in a discussion uninvited, shows disrespect and lack of courtesy. You should talk only when you are asked to talk or when it is your turn. This way your communication skill help develop your personality.
Be an active listener: Imagine talking to someone and the person is manipulating his/her phone and barely looks at you the whole time. How annoying and disrespectful! One way of developing personality is by engaging in active listening. This includes paying attention to the person talking by listening quietly, making eye contact with the person, nodding when necessary to show comprehension and follow up and asking questions that are related to the subject being discussed. When people feel that they are being listened to, they are very happy and satisfied. The listener is therefore considered a warm and caring person.
Be confident:Self-confidence is vital for developing one’s personality. Remind yourself of your competence, expertise and capabilities. You must learn to trust your own judgment and insight and be self-assured. Being confident is not synonymous to being boastful or arrogant. People who become overconfident tend to intimidate others which is not a characteristic of a good personality. Also having little or no confidence in oneself is detrimental to personal growth. There are persons who feel they aren’t good at anything. This low self-esteem often causes them to be uninvolved or disengaged in activities. The truth is you are good at something, even if it is just at eating, or smiling or cleaning. All you need do is identify anything good you do; no matter how little and acknowledge yourself. With that feeling of achievement, build your personalitythrougha sense of confidence in yourself. Besides, no one can do what you do the way you do it.
Take care of your physical appearance: Our physical appearance is one of the first things that give people an impression about who we are. To develop a good personality you must be conscious of your physical appearance; dress decently and neatly, and dress appropriately as per the event. Appearing physically attractive is not necessarily about wearing expensive or sophisticated clothes and accessories but it simply has to do with cleanliness and decency. Our physical appearance is not limited to dressing but also extends to our body sizes and shapes. You must be able to ensure that you have a physically appealing body. Don’t eat so much that you end up suffering from obesity or starve so much that you end up being malnourished and extremely pale. More so, there are some people who parade themselves with haughty and angry looks which are quite intimidating. People would fear to approach someone with such looks. Avoid frowning or carrying a long face, always put on a smile because smiles are contagious. Smiling makes you likable and attractive to others.
Keep it real: There are a lot of people with multiple faces. They put up different acts at different times to create false impressions about who they really are. Such people are neither trust worthy nor reliable. Many people fail to understand that real is unique; and unique is special. Being yourself is more beneficial to you than it is to others. Spending your life trying to be like others, pretending to be what you aren’t only narrows the chances of developing your potentials and the person you truly are.
Why go through all the stress? Is it to please someone, to compete with others, to belong to a certain category? All that is not necessary. Be honest and sincere to yourself and to others. Of course, fake things do not last, but real things do. A good personality is clothed in truth and not dishonesty.
Take care of yourself: It starts from you and goes out to others. Take care of yourself first so that you can take care of others. You must feed well, that is consume balanced diets and eat healthy foods; engage in sports and physical exercises; practice personal hygiene and do not neglect your health. Regular go for health checkups and seek treatment immediately in case of ill health. People who take care of themselves tend to be more organized and healthier with the advantage of handling their activities without hindrances as opposed to people who neglect themselves and end up being unable to deliver as per their expectations.
The above mentioned ways to improve personality are not exhaustive. There are several other personality development tips. It is your responsibility to build your personality; others may play a role but the greatest role is yours. There are numerous other personality development tips. There are no best ways to improve personality. We live in a dynamic world characterized by evolution and with the changing trends; we must be able to constantly improve ourselves so that we have what it takes to function smoothly in society. You must build your personality. The various ways to improve personality equip us with the necessary tools relevant for success in our day to day activities and interactions. Build your personality so you can live a life of quality.