30 Things to Do Before Getting Married

Getting married could be scary or exciting depending on the experiences of others or personal experiences one may have had the privilege to learn from. No matter how scared you are of getting married; you may have to get into it one day either out of your own choice or because of pressure from your family, friends or your colleagues. You may be wondering what your life will look like once you get married or what things you need to get married. There are some things you should do now, while you are not yet married so that you don’t regret once you are in it. Do the things you can only do as a bachelor before getting trapped in the web of marriage. Make a list of things you want to accomplish and work towards achieving them.Make sure that you are entering into your marriage life as responsible and as prepared as you could ever be. So in order to be at peace with yourself once you are into it, below are recommendations of things you should consider doing before getting married.

  1. Buy and use all the gadget you ever want to use

Before getting married in this highly technologically advanced world, it is important for you to get all the high tech inclusion you may want to get into. You may never have the opportunity of using these gadgets. As a man, once you are married, you become the provider and 70% of finances you spend will of course benefit your immediate household. If you are a fan of video games, don’t be afraid to get and enjoy it before your time runs out. When you start having kids, you may have to buy it, but not for yourself. If you are a fan of expensive phones, enjoy them while you still can. For your wife becomes the probable owner of the best phones in the house once that ring is in her finger and especially if you can hardly afford buying for you two. Make good use of the technology you have now while you are still a bachelor. You just might never have the freedom to do it at your own will once you are into marriage.

  1. Watch action movies

This is for sure; almost 80% of men are fans of action movies. They adore horror movies and could spend time and a lot of money to get and watch movies that interest them. Well guess what men? Before getting married, your choices might still be intact. But after you become a husband, that will more often than not have to change. Your taste of movies will eventually have to shift. You definitely have to succumb to hers’. You will have to begin getting used to romantic movies, Cinderela, Barbie and other Disneyland productions. Consider watching most of the movies you like as part of the things you need to get married. Satisfy yourself with your best movie collection and other accessories which she might not be too fund of before her arrival.

  1. If you Experience a Breakup, take advantage of it

Now I presume this is the weirdest thing you think you might be reading right now. But before getting caught up in the web of love, there are questions to ask before marriage, and one of them should be if you have had enough experience that can take you through your marriage life successfully. If you were to be faced with a difficult situation right now, would you be able to handle it? Having at least a breakup or two will teach you all you need to know about relationships and how they are handled in case of pains. Doing that count as one of the many very important steps to getting married, as it will definitely help you to know how to face your marital problems without committing the same errors you made in your previous relationships.

  1. Learn from past mistakes

One of the questions to ask before marriage is; what part did I play in the destruction of my previous relationships? Did I take them for granted? Did I do anything to try and solve them? Did I finally solve them? How should I handle them next time if I am faced with a similar situation? These are all very important questions you have to ask yourself before getting into a new relationship. The more the mistakes you committed in your past relationships, the better it should be for your new relationship. The old ones will serve as a stepping stone to building a stronger bond between your partner and yourself. All these are very important steps to getting married.

  1. Learn to trust

If you need to thrive in your marital life, then you need to start trusting your partner as early as now. Trusting your partner is one of the most important steps to getting married (if not the most important). Trust has to constitute the base of your relationship. If you can’t trust your partner even before the marriage, then you are gradually getting into a fluffy relationship which will hardly withstand the tests time. So the things you need to get married are Trust, Love and above all Respect for each other.

  1. Spend time alone

Before getting into any serious relationship that may eventually lead to marriage, it is good to create some space and spend some time alone. By spending time alone here, I don’t mean you should isolate yourself from people and go on social exile or stop interacting with other people. It means you should spend some time without being in a relationship. The more time you spend alone before the marriage, the more secured your future partner will feel while she is with you and it will equally help her trust you.

  1. Live with a non-family member

This the questions to ask before marriage; will I be able to live conveniently with my spouse? With this question in mind, this recommendation may be the best for you to follow. Live with someone that is not your family member. You may want to tryout this formula just as a test to see how you could cope with someone who is not related to you and make him/her your life partner.(not advisable if the non-family member is of the opposite sex)

  1. Get your finances in order

One of the major things you need to get married is to have a steady flow of income. It is not prudent to get married as someone who is still a job seeker. If you do that, then you are indirectly punishing your family to be into hunger and lack. Women too should not make depending on their husbands a duty. Before getting into a matrimonial home, it is necessary to have a backup mechanism which could also support the family when your husband goes financially handicapped or broke.

  1. Live alone

Before the marriage, make sure you have lived alone for at least a year. Be sure to separate yourself from room mates. Experience the tough life that comes with living in solitude. When you do that, then you can better appreciate and be grateful for the things your family adds to you when they eventually live with you. Being appreciative towards your spouse builds the foundation to a strong and long lasting relationship.

  1. Learn how to cook

Do I know how to cook properly? If I can what is my spouse’s favorite dish and can I make it for him/her? These are the kinds of questions to ask before marriage. If the questions remain unanswered, that means you are still wanting in some aspects. When we talk about cooking here, we do not limit it to the ladies only. It is imperative for men to know how to prepare meals for the house. We know it might be the wife’s obligation to make food for the house, but what about when she falls sick or is pregnant or travels? Think about that.

  1. Focus on your education

If you had any educational ambitions to tackle in life, then it would be best you had done that before getting into or thinking about marriage. The important thing is for you to reduce the stress that this might cause you if you eventually have to get married before completing your educational challenges. You may never know how difficult it would be to handle your children’s education and yours. However, this is not to discourage anyone from schooling after marriage, as some people might want to spend their post marriage life gathering one or two degrees and some other educational commitments.

  1. Amend your ways

Before marriage, be sure to have cleaned up your act and start putting away things in your life that could act as an impediments. Amongst the questions to ask before marriage is “what have I been doing that could possibly hamper my relationship with my spouse?” It may be alcoholism, drugs, gambling, theft, flirting, and other possible impediments to your future life. Work on these weaknesses and see how they can be harnessed in order to work for your good. If this is not done and these issues are taken into the matrimonial home, then it will more likely than not split your marriage.

  1. Spend time with other people’s kids

To have a happy marital life, before the marriage, you must make it imperative to spend some time with kids of relatives and neighbors. When you spend considerable time with kids, you get to know if you are ready to have kids or not. If you are ready, then be clear on the number of kids you would love to have and make your decision clear to your spouse before you two proceed in the tying the knot.

  1. Try to know why you want to get married

The steps to getting married might always seem to be lengthy and quite complicated, but it is important to go through most of them. One of them is to figure out why you want to get married at that particular time and to that particular partner. Do you genuinely love the person you are preparing to spend the rest of your life with? Are you ready to adopt the lifestyle you are getting into and can you cope in the different environment you are entering? Do you just want to avoid being called a spinster? Or do you just want to wear a wedding gown and throw a party for yourself? It is very vital to find out your real motives for getting into marriage before taking the leap.

  1. Learn to fight fairly

When I say fight in this context, I’m not implying a fist fight or physical brutality of any sort. In every relationship, there must always be disagreements that would result to some exchange of harsh words. Just be careful with the kinds of words that you utter, so that you may not have to regret what you said some time ago to your spouse because of a fight.

  1. Always love people the way they are

Going through the process of maturity is one of the many very important steps to getting married. You need accept the person you are getting married to is the way he/she is and there is little or nothing you can do to change them from what they are. Do not expect your partner to change her attitude because of you. If you chose to spend your life with him/her, then you will have to cope with the excesses that accompany that.

  1. Get acquainted with your spouse’s friends

Capturing your spouse to be and her friends is a very important thing you need to get married. In as much as you have to focus on your partner to be, if you have to completely win them, you have to get along with his/her friends. Never forget that friends could influence decision making at any time and that may include your relationship with your partner if you are not in good terms with them. So, always remember to keep close contacts with those he or she is close to.

  1. Meet your partner’s parents

Perhaps the most important thing you need to get married is the endorsement of his/her family. Don’t forget that if you are disapproved by her immediate family, then the chances of you getting married have been slashed down by more than 70%. When you get married, you are getting married to your spouse’s entire family as well. So you have to figure out if you can deal with the whole drama of coping with your spouse and his family at the same time, then only will you know what action to take next.

  1. Learn to apologize

It is normal that in every relationship, people will screw up in one way or the other. The most important thing is not who did what and how serious the offense was. The important thing is if your ability to apologize sincerely and regret what you did. When you learn to apologize even for what you did not really do, then you are already fit to get into marriage life. Apologize and try to not do what made you apologize in the first place.

  1. Learn how to be alone without necessarily being lonely

Of the many things you need to get married, independence should take one of the positions at the center stage. Learn to live in solitude and not missing anyone or feeling lonely. Take yourself out for a treat, watch a movie out alone and some things you may find interesting in. When you do this, you’d find out that what you do during this time is really what you want to do and in the long run will help you avoid loneliness when your spouse goes out on may be a journey. This tip is particular to the ladies than it is to the men.

  1. Agree on how your finances will be handled with your partner

Before getting acquainted with the fact that you are getting into a completely new life, you maybe had been the one managing your finances all by yourself without any statement of account handed to anyone. But of course that would definitely have to change once you are married. Try and agree with your partner on how they are from thence going to be managed. Doing this helps decrease the risk of a split in marriage because of financial impediments.

  1. Talk a lot about your future lives

Talk a lot about things you would love to achieve together, about the number of kids you may want to have, the schools your children will attend, would you both be working? These are important things to know before going into a lifelong partnership.

  1. Know your limitations

Before getting married, try to understand who you are getting married to and try to figure out your limitations as concerns him/her. There may be some things that may turn them off and some that may not. Know the kinds of things that makes your spouse happy and the ones that make him angry and try to work on them. If you get into marriage before discovering them, then there is going to be tension in the home.

  1. Quit talking about your ex if you had any

You may never know but taking too much about your experiences in your past relationships is one of the things that may give you a broken home if you do not quit before you are married. Talking too much about them gives your spouse the feeling he/she is not doing enough to please you and will eventually fallout with you if you don’t quit it. So avoid as much as possible to talk about that issue, no matter what context it is based on.

  1. Make clear your religious stands

This would especially be very important in the case of the two spouses being from different religious backgrounds. You have to agree which religion to follow as a family as this will also affect the children’s spirituality when they are old enough to make right and wrong choices. This is so important to decide as religious intolerance is continuously growing in contemporary society

  1. Visualize your life ten years from then with your partner

Try to see how your life will be with your spouse at least ten years after marriage. Search through for possibilities of a divorce and a broken home within that period and see how it can be contained. When this is done, you have then set up a solid grown for a fruitful marital life.

  1. Party like never before

Before taking your spouse into your marital home, make sure to have the fun you possibly could ever have. Party like you have never done before. You could decide doing so with your partner or alone, as after marriage, you might not have the opportunity to do so again because of other impediments like children and other commitments.

  1. Exchange phones with your partner

This especially will especially work with building the trust you two have for each other. Exchange phones for a period of at least 2 weeks without deleting the content of your phone. Do this and see what it actually feels like to snoop and to be snooped on. Access your partner’s social media platform and try checking them out. This actually strengthens the trust that you both have for each other which is very essential for the relations at that point in time before the marriage.

  1. Exchange credit cards

The fact is that when you two finally get married, you will have to find a more trustworthy way in which your finances are going to be handled. But this does not mean that you could not keep personal savings. Swap these credit cards and try to see how your personal spending could likely affect your future matrimonial home.

  1. Visit each other’s hometown and stay up all night

Before getting married, spend time in your various hometowns with your various friends and family. Let your hometowns know you two not as individuals but as couples who would be spending time together for life. Try staying up all night just talking about you. Think about when you two just met and how enthusiastic you were to meet each other. Try replicating those special moments by organizing all-nighs which including chatting and laughing, dancing and singing.


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